Vox Populi

The blogger requests input on the fate of Picasso's Tête de Faune.

Every year, Cards Against Humanity makes a special offer to patrons: send them $15 & receive whatever they feel like sending you.  Last year, I received personalized CAH cards AND one square foot of land in Maine.

This year, I have received three pairs of socks. They also bought a minor painting by Picasso.

Informational Video:

https://picasso.eightsensiblegifts.com/

I must vote tonight on whether this Picasso painting should be donated to the Art Institute of Chicago...or cut into 150,000 pieces (one of which I will receive--and frame).

Voting ends tonight.  I turn to you for my vote.  "Donate" or "Cut?"  Leave your one-word preference in the comment section.  Please let me know by 10 p.m. CST.  

Thank You, Kasey...from a Million Miles Away

Every once in a while, you find a song that hits on ALL cylinders, one that speaks to your current condition and mindset.  Kasey Chambers is an incredibly gifted songwriter.  She tours with Lucinda Williams, which makes perfect sense.  Her song, "Not Pretty Enough" got me through some tough points in my former life--giving voice to how others around me made me feel.

This one, though, goes even further.  It's almost like she got into my head and gave voice to my fears, my dreams of whatever future is left, and the need to make meaningful promises to myself and others...

...and remind me that I have to be open to complete failure and reset in my life, my love, my relationships with others, and my ties to God.

Here is the link to a YouTube video for "The Rain."  Sometimes it helps to hear Kasey's vulnerable voice express these meaningful lyrics.

I will try to break
Every habit that holds me
I will try to make everyone happy again
I will try to take anything you can throw at me
I will let the rain come in 

I will try to face everything that scares me
I will try to trace
Everywhere that I've been
I will try to wait for all of the hearts to be mended
I will let the rain come in 

And if I try too hard
Or maybe not hard enough
I'll be the one who says
"It's all gonna be OK"
And if it all falls down well its never gonna really matter
Because the rain washes everything away 

I will try to breathe
Deeper than all of the oceans
I will try to see
The battle instead of the winI will try to leaveAll that I've wasted behind meI will let the rain come in

And if I try too hard
Or maybe not hard enough
I'll be the one who says
"It's all gonna be OK"
And if it all falls down well its never gonna really matter
Because the rain washes everything away

May the rain wash away just the right things...for each of us.

Be blessed during this very dark time.  I mean that.  Always will.

Dealing with the Foreigners

"Man, there's refugees everywhere you look..."

Agreed, oh hypothetical white man.  They're even over there.

Violence in the Third World has made living in Syria untenable.  People leave war zones, whether they are civil wars or drug wars.  Right now, it's hitting Europe hard.  Hungary's government has proven incapable of making intelligent decisions, as has the "Fox News of Hungary."  Children die while legitimate refugee status gets delayed purposely.  People make analogies to Latin American immigrants coming to America illegally.  Donald Trump has exploited the "Texas Weakness" by hating Hispanic immigrants more than, say, Jeb Bush (W's brother).  Mitt Romney used that same weakness to take out Rick Perry four years ago.

Then there is the other side, where people a clamoring for an influx of Syrian refugees into the United States.  One article speaks to the comparison of Syrian refugee numbers to Bhutan, Burma (Myanmar?) and other countries.  I could address each country (especially Burma), but that would be dropping into the weeds on this argument.

The immigration issue is not an east-west issue.  It runs south to north.  This happens in both hemispheres.  Last summer, there was a massive influx of unaccompanied children.  The majority of those children (along with mothers and smaller children) entered the United States through Hidalgo County.

That was last summer.  2014.  We fixed that one.  Right?

We built "this:"

But it looks like this.  Ummm...  Well, those pictures are kind of hard to find.  Maybe an official picture of the unaccompanied minors or such.  Here's something:

Yep.  We handled it like we've done for the last two decades.  We built a detention center.  Several detention centers, really.  Karnes City is bigger, but I like Dilley (if only for that name).  Dilley, Texas is one of the more interesting centers.  In Dilley, we have a situation where "...these women are living in an environment that often exacerbates the trauma they have already suffered."

A couple of weeks ago, pro-bono immigration attorneys got thrown out of the Dilley Detention Center.  That may be related to a lawsuit from some of the women regarding poor medical care and general neglect.  Broken fingers? Drink more water.

Why are they still detained?  The Obama Administration claims that this is to deter others from making the flight to America.  This same administration produced an immigration speech summed best by Dan Kowalski:
The detention and deportation machine will continue as before. No mention, in the President's speech, of releasing the mothers and children from Artesia, from Karnes City, from Dilley, from Berks County.
Want the real answer?  Ask Corrections Corporation of America.  They made well over $60 million last quarter.  Guess how they became so profitable?  Uh-huh.  That story hit less than an hour ago down here.

We're not good at handling refugees.  We're not good at soccer, for that matter.

I know this sounds ridiculous to some.  I get that.  Here it goes, anyway:

We need to handle our own refugees first.

Now would be a good time to get that done.

Now.

When Goodbye Gets Ridiculous

Please note: the quotes inserted come from http://www.purplerow.com, one of the better baseball blogs.

Today was another in a long series of goodbyes. Some things just shouldn't happen.

Troy (deep breath) Tulowitzki (deep breath) is a (deep breath) Toronto (deep breath) BLUEJAY?!

The last time a trade this big happened at Coors Field, the staff ace left...and the owner got Romano's Macaroni Grill in return. Now, THAT's a crappy owner on par with Jerry Jones (no link inserted by design on THAT name).

Most readers of this blog won't care, but I do. You watch a guy play for 120 nights a year for a full decade, you get to expect seeing him. This man was the face of the entire franchise, and most of the current talent on that team can point to Troy as a reason for their success.

He was everything I wanted in a player: A ferocious competitor, a superstar you could build around, an incredibly hard worker who took prospects under his wing in the offseason, and a guy who understood how special it was for a fanbase to attach itself to a player who plays his entire career in one city.

The fate of a baseball team looms small in the lives of most people on this planet. To be honest, I openly admit that includes me. It's nice, but not necessary for happiness. I get all of that. I feel for the person who wrote:

Today is the saddest day of my life that didn't involve someone I'm close to dying. It hurts that much.

Look, I think--if you know me & my situation--that you can see the analogy. A boy can get tired standing on the pier waving goodbye to everything...repeatedly. The glass isn't half-full or half-empty--it's HEAVY after you hold it this long. Life doesn't ALL have to stay the same, but I'm trying to figure out what's left of the Paul Henley that lived in, say, 2010...or 2013, for that matter.

They're not just giving up a 30-year-old player, though. They're giving up the chance of having another franchise legend to slot next to Todd Helton in the pantheon of Rockies greats.

Tulowitzky autograph values kind of drop in Denver, long-term. No fan base will love Troy as deeply. Suddenly, a "franchise player" stands on the cusp of becoming a "journeyman player." Eventually, all these guys end up with the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, anyway. This one still stinks, though. If he wins two World Series rings in Toronto, why would he become the first Colorado entry into Cooperstown?  In fact, consider this: Troy Tulowitzki worries that his son, Taz, won't remember when his dad played in Denver. Again, I can relate as a father. I'm fighting to stay relevant from 366 miles away. These trades change stories for generations, too.

"Yep--I can remember seeing Troy when he [insert whatever event you choose]. That was back when he played for Colorado and all...no really...he USED to be a Rockie (sic).  Really. No. I MEAN it..."

Whatever:

Ask an Orioles fan what kind of package that would have made it acceptable to deal Cal Ripken in 1995. Ask Padres fans what Tony Gwynn trade would make them go back in time and make them pull the trigger themselves.

Time is the great arbiter.

I leave for Budapest (that's right...Hungary) on August 4, 2015. I leave to "celebrate" what would have been my 25th wedding anniversary. If things are all going to change, anyway, at least SOME of that change should come from me. "My turn" should start at some point...perhaps this is a way to begin said turn. Follow my Instagram account to see what I find in what seems to be an incredible place. That account is Think17. That moniker is the mark of yet another dead dream.

Even as the major league team was terrible, Tulo was something to dream on. Now, that dream is dead. Not being able to watch him as a Rockie anymore is a devastating blow.

Hey, some dreams die.

Quote me on that one. I'm cool with that. Plans change. People change. Circumstances change. Everything changes. When it gets ugly, fight back.

Fight back, good reader. Fight back.

So--PROPS to D.J. LeMahieu, who plays at Wrigley Field with a chip on his shoulder because he remains convinced that the Chicago Cubs quit on him just a little early...

Props to those who have stuck with me--including my future hosts in Hungary. I've had "friends," "employers," "neighbors," and "family" desert me and leave me to wonder What the Hell Just Happened. I'm becoming convinced it doesn't matter what happened; it really only matters what happens.

For MEN Only...

Beloved Gentlemen--

I'm about to embark on an effort to assist MEN who seem to face ridiculous consequences when confronted by divorce or Title IX issues.  Please HELP THIS CAUSE by acting in accordance with the following:

"NO" Means "NO"

"NO" means NO.

"Not Now" means NO.

"Maybe Later" means NO.

"I Have A Boy/Girlfriend" means NO.

"No Thanks" means NO.

"You're Not My Type" means NO.

"*#^+ Off!" means NO.

"I'd Rather Be Alone Right Now" means NO.

"Don't Touch Me" means NO.

"I Really Like You But ..." means NO.

"Let's Just Go To Sleep" means NO.

"I'm Not Sure" means NO.

"You've/I've Been Drinking or on some medication" means NO.

SILENCE means NO.

"__________ " means NO.

Date Rape = Not Understanding "NO."

Look for the woman to say something like...I don't know..."YES!"

It's hard trying to do the right thing.  Please don't make it harder!

Thanks...

It All Starts with Texas...

One of the truly great things for those NOT living in Texas is watching what the Supreme Court (or voters) will change in 10-20 years. Without George W. Bush, America would not have had the guts to elect Barack Obama. Democrats, you're welcome. Republicans, blame Obama.

Today, the SCOTUS opened the doors to the remaining humans wishing to get married. I can remember anti-sodomy laws in Texas getting struck down in Lawrence v. Texas right before I arrived. With smirks, the legislators just left the law in place. Over a decade later, the legislature still chooses each session to keep that law on the books.

That wasn't the only thing that happened this week. Texas is currently using federal housing money to encourage or even inflict segregation in Dallas. It's called "disparate impact," and mighty Texas lost to the The Inclusive Community Project, Inc. yesterday. This will become more and more significant in the coming months. Mark my words--or mark the words of today's article from Kimberly Reeves.

Texas was involved in fighting Obamacare as a plaintiff, and lost that, as well. In all, our governor has sued the Obama administration over 25 times.  I can only think of one time he was truly "successful."

Yep, we got us a LEGAL statue on the capitol grounds. Probably spent $3 million defending this rock. Texas has a fifteen-story building filled with attorneys, and far too many of them spend their days defending whacky rules and laws coming from the Texas capitol. On the bright side, they lose a lot.

New regulations against abortion led to Wendy Davis becoming a household name in Texas. I look for them to be struck down soon. The immigration challenge against DACA/DAPA comes out of Brownsville, Texas--a fine city.

And in perhaps the most ironic response to today's decision, the kingpin of voter suppression (the Texas Lt. Gov.) had this to say:

I look forward to the day when ALL Texans vote. At that point, Texas will become one of the most progressive states in the Union.  And I will laugh.

Any ideas for laws we could make in Texas that would spur progress in America and the world? Perhaps a ban on flying cars. Mandatory global warming. We could start the ball rolling! Let me know your thoughts.

La Quinta Hotels, Corpus Christi, and Redeeming Love

Corpus Christi may be the "Happiest place on Earth."

This has been an awful couple of years, and this has been intensified by a strained relationship with a dream-come-true girl who is also my eldest daughter. Currently, a car accident has me struggling when under deep stress. That fact seemed to be manipulated this past weekend. "Fathers Day" had me waving good-bye while watching my ex-wife and two youngest children driving away from my home.

Fathers who care have no rights. We need to fix that.  (More on that henceforth...)

NB!--A dad needs to think. Thus, my thoughts are in italics.

On the loneliest Monday of my life, which followed the WORST Father's Day I am capable of surviving, I was visited by a friend. Talking can help after a brain injury (and rest). I sometimes think clearly--like a man capable of the position I used to hold at STC--and may hold again. A lot of my "interrogations" were based on my "ability to drive" and the "new car." No road trip is possible if an adult can't drive and a car can't function.

Meanwhile, I've just been "told" that my eldest will be with the rest of the family in Corpus Christi. All will be reunited on this day--except me.

Fathers who care have no rights. We need to fix that.  (More on that henceforth...)

This is a bad situation...
But I have a car--a 1992 Ford Thunderbird.
I have a brain--no matter what people seem to think.

Perhaps it's just just time to see if THIS brain and THIS car can make it to, say, Corpus Christi...

So, I know this much:

1. My daughter is allegedly in Corpus Christi
2. She's staying at a La Quinta
3. She's attending orientation at TAMU-CC

I drive as far as WHATABURGER FIELD, and...no answer to my texts or calls...

Turn around? Focus on surviving? Prove you can drive and the car works? There are AT LEAST five (5) La Quinta hotels in the Corpus Christi area... Maybe I just turn around.

No. I've done this too many times before. I have sat in my car across the street from this young woman's dormitory in Arlington, just to know a little more of what her life was like. I'm here. I may as well visit the campus. See where she will be attending class.

As I near the campus on the highway, suddenly there is a La Quinta. There's a Rudy's BBQ nearby. That place has great food AND gasoline...

I may as well just swing through the lot. I can't imagine her car would be there, anyway--probably at another one of these hotels.  It would be wrong to just blow past this parking lot. I mean, it's right IN FRONT of me...

Guess what? I notice her Subaru in the lot before I finish the statement in my own head.

I'll just park somewhere near her car. I'll pick up a gift card at Rudy's. That way, she/he can get BBQ and/or gas based on what they need. I'll just leave it at the front desk.  I'll put one of my cards on her windshield. She'll know I was here and cared...

I get the gift card and notice that the USWNT is playing in the "sports bar" between the Rudy's BBQ and the hotel.

Then I realize that I have three (3) things happening simultaneously:

1. I am within 1/4 mile of my beloved daughter for the first time in months.
2. I am on "neutral" territory for the first time in ages.
3. My daughter's boyfriend is walking toward me on the same sidewalk, along the same frontage road, off of a highway in a city none of us really know.

How could this be random? How could this not have meaning? How could I NOT be here right now???

"Hi! Good to see you! How was the orientation? Did you get over to the other college?"

He was walking to "the store" (Rudy's) to get her Gatorade and Chicken Lo Mein. My daughter was exhausted and unconscious. Seems like a good boyfriend. Just sayin'. No other family around...don't care why not right now. Without my asking, it's suggested I wake her to say "Hi." This is the room number. Turns out she didn't reply because she was asleep.

"Look, when in doubt a person should remember this--you regret the things you DIDN'T do more than any of the things you ACTUALLY DID."

My barely-awake daughter greeted me with a hug longer than those of my other children combined. For perhaps the most perfect of 15 minutes, I reconnected with this fantastic young woman who carries half of her DNA from me. It was one of the best Mondays I've experienced in my near-50 years.

As of now, I'm not sure that Corpus Christi isn't the "Happiest place on Earth."

Where You FROM, Anyway?

Props to Governor, ummm...Dennis Daugaard (RIGHT--thought it was still Janklow...). This is an amazing promotional campaign approach:

"WHY DIE ON MARS? WHEN YOU CAN LIVE IN SOUTH DAKOTA. We've got plenty of job openings and all the food, water and oxygen you need!"

Complete with grammatical error & Earth-like atmosphere--I bring you South Dakota's new economic development message: You (probably) wouldn't die here. 

Wow. In most states, this would be an ironic internal campaign. In THIS state, they really mean it.  Here's the bizarre video:  

https://m.youtube.com/watchv=HrX8OTFSFZI

All comes from this materwork of the ridiculous: 

http://www.youcanliveinsouthdakota.com/

No, really. They MEAN this. Really.

In Praise of Marketing

Having spent a decade or so in the Austin area, I was privy to some pretty special events. For one, the SXSW festival setup offered a wide range of things to keep a spring break active. It was more than just a bunch of musical groups living in vans (though THAT is always cool). The film festival rivals the best in the world. The interactive festival gives a person a glimpse into the future. In 2011 we encountered our first "printer" that made things out of plastic (!). This week, the young man that accompanied me sent me to Indianapolis this little gem:

If you live in the Austin area (or know someone who lets you crash for a week), you can catch a wealth of ancillary activities and insights. This may be the key reason to experience events like SXSW, Comic Con, and even major sporting event (even without tickets to actual events).  These kinds of events and opportunities don't come to McAllen, but this post comes from Indianapolis--the Oklahoma City of the Midwest (TM Paul Henley 2015). Right now, Indy is in the throes of hosting the Final Four (and related things), which they seem to do about as often as the Olympics take place (2006, 2010, 2015...). Great minds are present, throughout. I've been especially amazed by the masterful marketing approaches--nothing amazingly new, just impeccable execution of standard approaches.  This work comes from the masters: Coke, AT&T, GM, etc.

Case in point: the March Madness Music Festival.

Three nights of concerts by impressive lineups.  It's a gift from the NCAA to its host city each year. Tonight, we missed Cold War Kids, caught the end of Weezer's set, and ignored Imagine Dragons. It was an incredible mix of college students, locals, and die-hard fans. After Weezer had finished, we headed to the Coke Zero section. We were greeted by this:

The wording is a made from a hose full of Coke Zero that flows to a fountain:

I'd bumped into this little gem online. Here it was: the first "drinkable billboard" in my personal history.  If you want to see the story behind this idea, click here. If I post anything about this, I'm supposed to add "#opentotry." I asked if that was legal to use words like "open" in Indiana these days. I was told, "Coca-Cola supports an inclusive environment." Message. Discipline.

At this point, you need to realize that this area becomes "holy ground" to a diet cola junkie. My youngest daughter just informed me of the issues that diet sodas bring to your life. Yep. Understood. Meanwhile, the holy ground was lush, but a little muddy.

Didn't matter.  There was no reason to look down, literally or figuratively.

The rest of the exhibit didn't disappoint, either. The Coca-Cola folks knew exactly how to strike a balance between fun and memorable. We walked past a set of live games (like a 4' x 4' version of a"Connect Four" board, with the game being announced live through loudspeakers). After all, gotta walk past that. Why? Because that's how you get to the actual trophy to be awarded to Monday night's NCAA champion. After a 2-minute wait, our photo was taken and I was texted a link to get to this photo:

(Yeah, yeah...you are what you "drink")

It was a pretty amazing little setup--like a non-alcoholic version of the Bud Light "Up for Whatever" commercials. As we left, we passed by a monstrous Ferris Wheel--also free to anyone interested. You could photograph the concert and use a different hashtag. The line was long, and we were done for the day.

As I fall asleep in this fine hotel (nestled quietly in North-North Oklahoma's "Meth Land"), I want to make two things clear:

1. I'm being manipulated by commercial interests.
2. I'm totally fine with that.

Good bands end with a drum circle

Proving a Negative or Losing: The Other Side to Title IX

(Article Photo from InsideHigherEd.com)

A recent higher education news article was titled, “Questions on Money, Influence and Competence.”

The news item in focus is based on two young women who attended a fraternity party and woke up the next morning feeling drugged…and with one, raped.  Rape is one of the most confusing crimes to me.  It is a crime of pure violence that requires a deranged man to be aroused throughout the process.  Rape victims live their entire lives fighting awful memories and harboring hatred and mistrust placed by the rapist.  Bo Burnham put it best at 1:15 in this video.

In response to the allegations, Brown University hired laboratories to take samples.  It seems like they need to review their list of laboratories.  An Ivy League university managed to mismanage the entire process, and this sparked the protest pictured at the top: people taping dollar bills to their mouths to signify how rich dads can make “rape charges go away.”  The IX written on each bill signifies Title IX, which is supposed to protect women.

The story is being lauded by commenters as balanced in its approach.  I can stipulate (for now) that the facts may all be included; I disagree that the story is balanced.  Or “Fair & Balanced!”

The opinions of the accused do not appear in the story until the end of the story.  This assumes a lot of the reader.  The story moves begins with a picture of a protest and the outrage at Brown University among its community.  It details what allegedly happened.  It discusses Brown’s bungled attempts to investigate.  It speaks to the denial of the alleged victims.  It allows for the idea that one of the accused young men had a rich father exert influence.  Only after these do we see the other side of this accusation, under the heading “Privilege and Power.”  You see, the alleged perpetrators have a pretty compelling story, as well.

So I’m going to throw out one of the least popular questions I’ve ever put in writing:

What if they didn’t do it?

Although these kinds of things are rare, in terms of sexual violence cases—so are sexual assaults in general.  To assume this young man’s guilt is akin to assuming (on a macro level) that sexual assault “just don’t happen” at Brown…or South Texas College.  Yes, two young women were denied their “day in court,” at least on campus.  On the other hand, at least one father, two fraternity brothers—and an entire fraternity chapter—were presumed guilty, punished directly, punished indirectly, discredited…and denied their “day in court,” at least on campus.  And as of right now there is NO protest coming to support them if they can somehow PROVE their innocence.

The show of power at Brown (the dollar bill march) may be generally directed at Brown—but it is specifically directed at two college-age students (and a father) who remain accused of some awful things.  It’s one thing to come directly after a person you know to be guilty, i.e.—Ferguson, Staten Island, Pine Ridge.  It’s a completely different situation when guilt remains in question.  Many of these same protesters oppose the death penalty, often on the grounds that a state could put an innocent person to death.  How is this different, aside from the stakes? 

Groups like Families Advocating for Campus Equality (F.A.C.E.) work to promote the rights of the accused in these cases, but doing so tends to make you as unpopular as a LGBT person in the early 2000’s.  Did you notice the men in the picture?  Why are they shoved in the back (or to the side) of the camera angle? 

Rape should equal prison time.  False accusations of rape should equal prison time.  In the end, the two possible victims will be seen in a positive light.  In the end, the two alleged perpetrators will be made uncomfortable and miserable…and they will likely have to find another school to try to start their lives over.  My guess is their next schools won’t be Ivy League schools.  It’s a de facto means of expulsion, which is justice being served on some lower-level degree. 

Unless they didn’t do it…

When to Quit

Such a beautiful, beautiful option...gone.

Yesterday, news came that Sweet Briar College will be closing on August 25.  Inside Higher Ed covered the story very well this morning. 

Usually, this blog waits for a bit before commenting on things that happen.  Thus the blog's title.

I can't on this one.

You see, SBC was more than just another Liberal Arts College; it was a women's LAC.

It wasn't just another women's LAC, either; it was a women's LAC with a proud heritage and focus on the sciences.

Women in science?  For over a century?  How does THAT college close--now??  I thought we LOVED all that STEM stuff...especially for girls.

It was quite a surprise, too.  SBC still has almost $100 million in endowment funds.  This is Sweet Briar's way to end its run like John Elway, as opposed to Brett Favre.  Most financially failing colleges tend to hang on to the bitter end, damaging the credibility of the college (and ensuing degrees), leaving faculty/staff to wonder when to leave, making potential students wary of matriculating.  It's painful to watch a long, slow death.  This decision seems pretty responsible, practical, and brave.

I get that.  But Sweet Briar has a special, successful place in American education history.  It was also the one school that my youngest daughter could attend as a near-perfect match.

So the meaningless battle in my head rages on for the perfect college for a 14-year-old girl that wants to be a veterinarian but naturally learns things from different angles and perspectives.  She would have thrived there...and large, sterile universities haven't served the Henley family well.  For that matter, that whole Obama "bang for the buck" approach isn't working down here.  Someday I'll be brave enough to add the links that go with that last sentence--maybe if I'd attended a male version of Sweet Briar, I'd have the guts to do that today.

Education should be about options.  This week, a whole slew of options were lost with one responsible, painful decision.

Sniff...

In Defense of Cheating

This little bit of bitterness comes from another blog.

After the most exciting NFC Championship Game in my memory and the most boring AFC Championship Game that followed, we have two teams ready for the upcoming Super Bowl.  The New England Patriots...and the Seattle Seahawks.

THIS is an exciting game for me, as it pits two of the very, very best at what they do--cheating.

What we have are two cheaters as coaches.  New England is coached by a man who paid the highest penalty for cheating in NFL history.  He was so obvious that South Park mocked him in a sendup of Stand and Deliver (a fine movie--the best teaching film ever).  Today, there are indications that the Patriots deflated the footballs for last night's AFC Championship Game.

On the other coast, you have the man who helped USC enjoy years of sanctions, including a vacated Heisman Trophy.  A man who called time-out four times in a half during the referee lockout.  At the beginning of this football season, he and the Seahawks paid over $300,000 in fines related to player contact.

Sure, you can be disgusted, but I will remain amazed and impressed.  Consider some other things:

Bill Belichik is the longest tenured coach in the NFL (among active coaches).  Teams tend to keep winners.  He has three fully-fuctional adult children.  Pete Carroll has been married for 38 years. He's a grandfather of two.  Both coaches are noted for giving chances to players in need of a little more understanding.  Though neither has a perfect track record, both are generally decent human beings in society.  They're just cunning on the field.

Football is a game.  There are rules.  If you break the rules (and get caught), then you pay a fine...or draft picks...or other such things.  Nobody gets physically hurt in this kind of "cheating."  It's not like the Saints--who paid players to inflict concussions.  It's not like the Ravens--who can't stop beating women and killing people.  Seems like I mentioned that last one sometime earlier...

As Jim Rome often says:

If you're not cheating, you're not trying...and...it's only cheating of you get caught.

In fact, Rome is willing to discuss the right way to cheat.  It's a game, after all.

There are those who follow the rules perfectly, but have not the character to prove the rules meaningful.  These two coaches know that you push the envelope, just like athletes do.  When they get caught, they pay the price and move on.  Were we all that capable and willing.  In other cases, we see teams split apart by "commitments to religion" that equate stealing signs as a sin.  It's a game...try not to get so bitter.

This is a perfect Super Bowl matchup for me: a supreme battle between the two greatest cheaters in the NFL.  It won't matter who wins on February 1, 2015; the trophy will be vacated five years from now.

And NOBODY will consider the loser to be the "true" champion.

Perfect.

It's Fine...

I'm OK.

I want to tell a lot of people that right now.

At about 2:10 a.m., I made a left turn toward an on-ramp. There was a curb (not painted, not obvious) that looked a lot to me like the right lane. N-n-n-n-n-nope. THAT was an epic crunch. I spent the next hour alone (NOBODY enters that turnpike ramp?). I changed the tire. Once I did that, I realized the car was deeply un-drivable--and I didn't have the ability or tools to make it function. Nobody stopped to help until I'd given up after 75 minutes. After that it took another 45 minutes to get to a room.

The trip started in the south suburbs of Denver in a blinding snowstorm. Neck pain, headache, strained eyes & strained nerves. After 10 or 11 hours of straight driving, I was three miles from my hotel.

The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday. (Mary Schmich)

Here's another multi-thousand dollar surprise. 2014 was the worst year of my life. At this point, 2015 looks to continue the pattern. A lesser man would die from this life, but I can't even seem to sleep! For about two hours, I became an angrier, lesser version of myself. Every once in a while, I find a dark chamber in my heart. When things get so emotionally overwhelming, I fall in--or choose to walk into it. Fortunately, that mindset never takes hold permanently. Satan may kill the car, but God wins the day.

What I offer in this post is some insight into how I tick.  There are a few "power questions" that I try to remember throughout the course of a day--and certain questions I use to keep me from just giving up on things.  Today, I present my current state of mind in light of my crisis question:

What would make this worse?

You'll note most people tend to think in terms of "What would make this better?" Professionally, that question can be somewhat helpful as a start.  On the other hand, this question tends to lead to dissatisfaction when things go well. In fact, it could lead to all Seven Deadly Sins if you let it.

1/2/2015--WWMTW:

Immediate danger would make this worse.  I'm in a Holiday Inn.  There is heat, coffee, an internet connection, carpet, a better bed than I'll have for a month, working cable...all kinds of good things.  I wasn't physically injured (except for a few scrapes changing the tire, etc.)

I could be on the Safety Corridor or next to a feedlot on the Texas Panhandle. It became apparent to me to "head east" on my return trip. I avoided a lot of the ice & snow. This accident happened in one of the largest cities in North America--one with over 300 body shops.

This could be a minor loss--or no loss.  I was trying to GET somewhere. Trying to see my son's soccer game. I have a son. He plays a sport I love. He has two sisters, too. I love them, as well. Whether in a broken Ford Focus or a rental car. I likely will see them soon. I'm not headed to a funeral, either. Was reminded of that scenario when I passed through Blackwell, Oklahoma last night.

I could be truly alone. Yes, I'm physically alone, in terms of close friends/family in Oklahoma City. Still, I feel like I have to blog. I want to explain my frame of mind to a lot of people--people that have reached out. People that are worried. People that deserve to know I'm fine.

Lack of resources to fix the Focus. I will PAY for this--because, eventually, I will be able to pay for this. I still have some credit left; I still have a means of income.

This could have happened on 1/2/1995. If that were the case, I wouldn't be able to blog...or connect...to all who would care about my well-being.

This is my initial list. I'm still working on others.  I will continue to do so. You get to choose where you focus your attention (usually).

I'm fine--OK, I will be fine.  Thank you for helping me get there.