In My Life...I've Loved Them All

I’m feeling old these days.

Some of this comes from the fact that I AM old. My body is on the back end of this run called life. I get that. I’m really, really fine with that, as well. A perfect end awaits. As my beloved wife told me once, “I’m not afraid of dying; I’m afraid of the time between right now and when I die.”

Exactly.

Part of this “oldness” stems from the incredible changes in society, though. Growing up, everybody in my world looked like me. Now, I've gone from "White" to "Anglo;" I've gone from "Normal" to "Straight."

Life in the Silent P is intense. Problems I never imagined 20 years ago (let alone understood) are being met with honesty, creativity, and improved communication. We've worked on that at the Henley Hacienda, as well. Here is the first thing you notice when walking into our house these days:

Our lives seem to be a microcosm of this suddenly brave new world. Case in point: January 17, 2013--the day before I left for trips to Washington, DC and Atlanta.

What follows is one day’s activity—in fact, you could constrain this to a time period between about 3:30 and 8 p.m. During the whirlwind of activity, it was just handling a typical day. Only in retrospect do I notice how different things have become in our lives over the past decade.

·       One child approached me, looking for advice (or at least vindication) on how she dealt with a friend who has begun to self-mutilate…and the other friend who joined her. The first instance came from a bisexual Hispanic girl, the second came from a straight Anglo (!) girl. For now, all are fine. The real issues are being addressed for perhaps the first time.

·       Another child took a MOCK test in reading, in preparation for the actual tests in the coming months. Kids are adapting to the adult world's testing mania. Everybody seemed to take that one in stride...except the education community that is getting punished from all sides.

·       A child went to hang out with a serious boyfriend, who’s Salvadoran (DON’T call him Mexican). Later, she needed to return clothes to a friend who is half Indian and half Mexican.

·       My wife came home with the flu and a fibromyalgia flare (did we have that back then?). She is the “Testing Coordinator” at her elementary school, where they were also taking “practice” standardized tests. 

·       During the fake test at this woman’s school, there was a “reverse evacuation” situation. A burglary got interrupted, and the “perpetrator” was at large in the general vicinity.

·       Her head principal feels comfortable about how things went. He is Hispanic, gay, and married. He also happens to be a really, really good educator for one of the poorest schools in the five-county area. It’s a bilingual school, which necessitates tests in both English and Spanish.

·       I had to pick up my child from the home of a half-Asian, half-Anglo (!) family. When we got home, he proceeded to fire up his XBOX, connect virtually to the same friend, and then kill zombies with him as a team. My understanding is that these are World War II battles that include zombies.

·       I inquired about the half Mexican/half Anglo (!) girl that spent the weekend with us because her Asian stepmother couldn’t stand her anymore. We were blessed to provide them all a needed break. Things have returned to what is their “normal,” and they are working things out as best they can.

·       My neighbor down the street used to live in a culvert. She now lives in a house with her father. They have no water, but they do alright. I had to help her find out how to enroll her son in school. Her son was sent to her because the father couldn’t stand it anymore.

·       Oh, and this woman’s son is half black/half Anglo (!)--similar to the President of the United States, whose SECOND inauguration I attended, upon the invitation of my new Hispanic congressman.

So many barriers to love…falling daily. Nobody’s ignoring problems; they’re dealing with issues.

I look at the youth and young adults of this country (and this world), and I find myself mesmerized with their bravery, their sense ofsocial justice, their ability to cut through the crap to what is real…and then find entertainment in the crap, itself. My generation watched crappy television and called it good. This generation watches crappy television and calls it crap.

Despite what I’m hearing from people older than me, I think the future of this planet is a bright one. Big issues that my generation ignored will be handled, and we will accept the consequences on the promise that America and Earth will be better for our great-grandchildren.

Nobody in my world used to talk of a happy future. Now, this generation allows me to dream a little about a time when I won’t be around. There is hope that the best days are coming, whether I’m here or not.

Throughout my childhood and most of my adult life, the future looked bleak. Now, things seem to be improving with the outlook of the American people. I see potential. I see possibility.

I’d like to think that people like me will have something to do with that.

The FIRST Step in Cutting Higher Education Costs

I got this from the American Enterprise Institute

College is expensive.

I'm convinced that the ages of 18-23 are the perfect time for the college years. It's when eating ramen noodles for lunch and eating at Taco Bell for dinner is acceptable. Cheap food is what many that age would eat anyway.

But institutions of higher education do not hire young people. They hire people who arrive on campus with large amounts of debt from multiple degrees. My last higher education post paid me a salary of $34,000. That was supplemented with free WIC cheese and complimentary school lunch for my eldest. It wasn't a job worth keeping, based on that salary. I loved the work; I couldn't afford to keep doing it.

In light of that, political pressures from the left and the right are bearing down on higher education. The tuition is too high. Graduation rates are too low. It's ridiculous. You could buy a car for that amount of money. In some cases, you could buy a house.

I thought the point of higher education was to make it so you could buy the car and house with the knowledge and skills you acquire while on campus...and then buy better ones down the road. In some cases, that comes through a lucrative position in engineering. In other situations, students learn to think and act accordingly. If either or both become the case, then you see a benefit from higher education for the rest of your life.

There are ways for a family to combat the cost of higher education. Yes, there is federal student aid. Yes, some tuition discounts get applied. But coming from the side of the institution, I can honestly say a key way to cut costs is through textbooks. Textbooks are a racket.

I just caught a session on Open Education Resources at the Association of American Colleges and Universities Annual Meeting. OERs offer a no-cost way to access information, organized information. NITLE is releasing a paper on OER use at colleges. It's release comes on a CommentPress site, so have fun making any comments!

When I was finishing my doctorate, I had a professor that required students to purchase "the packet." It was a collection of handouts and specific teaching methods, photocopied and bound by a local print shop near campus. There was no publisher involved. It was written information, but it was cheap (about $6). That packet was more precious than any of the textbooks used in class. In fact, it seemed like the textbook was used as a sort of justification--"we meet some accreditation standard because we teach out of a mainline textbook." Those days are gone, as long as there is evidence the standards are met.

Today, there isn't even need for a nearby print shop. Everything can be placed online--accessible by password, if a professor so chooses. It can also be placed online by publishing companies, which leads to more exorbitant fees.

At some point in time, a professor should know what he wants his students to know, do, and be like at the end of a semester (or year). Working backward from that, it is not ridiculous to teach a course without a textbook full of reading assignments that never get completed. Instead, professors could focus on those things students will do...and create their own "textbooks." They don't have to do it alone, either. Simple applications like Boundless help organize such information. In the end, the curriculum becomes specific to the professor, not some outside textbook writer.

The textbook requirement drop? It's crucial to the Taco Bell world of student debt. Multiply this situation by 8-10 classes per year, and it means thousands of dollars.

This approach to learning materials is positive in numerous ways. It can allow professors to teach what they think is important. The information is more pertinent, and the financial relief can make the difference between staying in school or dropping. It can make private schools more affordable.
It's important that institutions explore this option and act accordingly.

The money students save could be as much as...a down payment on a house or a car.

Hurry Up and Grow Up!

Recently, a tweet came from the THIRD STRING QUARTERBACK at Ohio State:

It's ridiculous to most people, but it doesn't surprise me. Cardale is 18. He's convinced he will play in the NFL in a couple of years. Three, tops. He's been so successful until this point. He's been adored throughout his adolescence, which is ending but not over (obviously).

He'll grow up. One way or another, he'll grow up. Maybe he realizes there is no NFL in his future. Maybe there is some NFL, but it gets usurped by bad ideas of Cheesecake Factory investments.

These days, there is tremendous pressure to grow up and get through college. It gets worse when football is involved. I hope Cardale Jones goes on to a lucrative football career. If not, I hope he opens a chain of Vince Young-style restaurants, using his dying caché to make it work.

But that would mean getting a degree in how to manage a restaurant. Perhaps he's at the wrong school for that.

I hope the publicity pushback leads to Cardale's repurposing and academic success. If not, I hope he's able to find a way in his late 20's or early 30's to fix this attitude. In the meantime, we watch the promise of a young man drop significantly while he remains in a self-important rut.

Good luck, #3. I hope you get your chance. Somewhere.

Lockdown! (er..."Reverse Evacuation")

It's tough being a kid these days...especially in Texas.

It's not enough that school has been dumbed down by multi-pile choice (sic) tests, anymore. Or that school funding from politicians is paltry compared to the need they, themselves created...and it's getting worse. Those are typical gripes.

This only marginally relates to what happened in Connecticut. I'm not trying to throw in my opinion on guns or mental health or autism or heroic teachers.

I'm talking about the "crowd control" approach to handling "threats."

In a single two-week period, we saw tragedy in Connecticut (or, as one local elementary principal wrote repeatedly, Conneticut). In God's Country, however, my eldest daughter has faced this "reverse evacuation" procedure three times. This last time? Somebody called the police because a guy had an air gun about 1/2 mile from the school. It was dismissal time. Everybody was unloaded from the bus and quarantined (er, reverse evacuated) for about an hour. Some family friends from Round Rock have faced it twice. Manor had an issue, as well. Those are just the ones I know about from education's Word-of-Mouth Network.

You'd be surprised at the incredible number of crimes that DON'T take place in schools. Doesn't matter. All 2600 people in a building get treated as though they are in some type of "bomb shelter-lite."

These are the same kids who were somehow able to function in this same world without these drastic measures before. Then, somebody flipped a switch--my guess was at an insurance company. There are RULES to handle threats at schools now, and they rival anything you might find at O'Hare International Airport.

Is there a stranger on campus? LOCK THE ENTIRE SCHOOL DOWN! NO BATHROOM BREAKS UNTIL SPRING!

Did somebody think they might have seen a strange bag in a hall about an hour ago? HAVE ALL STUDENTS HIDE UNDER THEIR DESKS IN PITCH DARK FOR 112 MINUTES!

Do these systems work? No.

On the other hand, DeAnn's institution of "lower learning" experienced a fair threat today...at least if you were the Head Honcho of the Day. An irate parent, obviously agitated, backed the principal into a corner--yelling, swearing, threatening, bullying. The situation was handled splendidly, and very few even knew that anything was happening or did happen.

I did, though. I have insider information. :-)

The kids still left the building. They are beginning Christmas/Winter Break.

That's an example of how to de-escalate a situation.

LOCKDOWN!!!!!! just escalates things to the point of the ridiculous.

There's only one thing worse in Texas public education: the way they treat teachers during testing week. Let's just call that a teaser for a future blog.

Yes, We Have No Bananas

[NB! This post was written while I was held back on the interstate highway in Arkansas for 45 minutes (along with perhaps 1200 or so other vehicles). I was driving my "new" 1999 VW Cabrio home from Philadelphia, and finshing the last leg of the journey the Sunday before Labor Day of 2012. My situation seemed like something to write. You are free to call it a take on American society, women's issues, family issues, or just spit on your computer in disgust. I just found this on my iPhone Notes application. I am sharing it with you in a lighthearted manner. Please accept it as a "holiday break" from the Heavier Things. Happy New Year!]

--
Notes from the road:

If you want a banana, and you are traveling west on I-40 through Tennessee and Arkansas, you are S.O.L.

On the other hand, if you would like Adult things, you are in good shape. This is important, as I am an adult who wants a banana. What I choose to do with that banana would be an adult decision. Not that it's any of your business, but I would choose to EAT this hypothetical banana.

There are three major types of adult stores on interstates. One is the adult mega-something. Most look like shacks, but my guess is they go down underground 125' or so, allowing for a true mega-plex/mega-storemega-whatever experience.

Another is the adult outlets. Amazing, this country we live in. Adult video production companies are sending discontinued items and factory seconds to be offered to the public at deep discounts! An entire store of black-and-white dirty pictures and porn out-takes. What's not to love?

Finally, most tempting, are the adult supercenters. This being the home state of Wal-Mart, perhaps you can buy groceries (bananas) there, as well as porn, yarn, novelties, greeting cards, and gifts of ALL kinds. Perhaps they have a pharmacy where you can get both Horny Goat Weed and Lipitor.

Wait. That IS Wal-Mart.

They're allegedly selling peaches by McDonalds, but I'm holding out for a banana. My guess I will remain doing so for all of Arkansas.

[Blogger's Note: There were no bananas in my life that night. No pornography, either.]

Happy New Year! May you find all the bananas you care to buy in 2013,

pth

PISD Domestic Partner Healthcare

PEA has taken the first set of slots. They are speaking to this policy as a benefit being threatened, much like the salary schedule and 3 sick days were taken from them in the past.

7:35
The PHS cafeteria is covered in signs reminding everyone of the "hate-free" status of this school. The "No Place for Hate" crowd is following the PEA lineup.

7:40
Mine will be the last testimony of the evening. My number?  40.

7:45
Hate shows its head via John Saenz (and "Texas Values"). Since he's Hispanic, he knows discrimination. Veiled threat of legal action.

Pastor from First Baptist Church of Pflugerville...claims to be the hate monger...it's hard for him to hear. He's devoted his whole life to loving people. His congregation loves P'ville, and they've done a lot. He feels bullied by name-callers. That's NOT his reputation. This is simply about where the majority lies.

8:00
Next testimony reminds board that an opinion from AG has no force of law and hasn't happened.

8:03
My priest is up now. She's making my key point: nobody seems to care about the heterosexual domestic partners. Jesus said, "Love everyone, and take care of everyone."

8:07
John Henkens--"This will fall on the backs of the taxpayers." I will work to check the spelling. He asked to get this on the record.

8:08
TSTA just finished their statewide staff meeting today. Pretty much the whole staff is in the "Silent P" tonight. Testimony to this point is firmly leaning toward keeping the benefit.

8:30
The best HS debater in Texas (#2 in nation) is the son of a same-sex couple. Refreshing to find an issue that brings high school students (and college students who graduated from PISD) into the discussion.

The other side seems surprised that they have met resistance. I've never seen these types of people act so timid in a Texas public venue.

8:46
A smattering of testimony to flip the vote. Still, overwhelmingly in favor of keeping the "benefit." My testimony is coming soon. It's in God's hands. Kind of like this internet connection!

No, You Can't.

"Let me give you a word about the philosophy..." of Texas public schools.

They're different than most states.

In most places, activities like football and cheerleading are just that: activities.

In Texas, they are classes.

You get a grade.

You meet during the school day.

It's true in middle school, as well.In the middle of the morning today, a group of 7th graders are jogging out to a practice field in full gear to practice football. When finished, they will trot back to the building and dress back in their school clothes to attend math class.

In high school, it gets more significant, though.

You also meet after school.

After all, you can't expect to win in this state unless you practice from 3-6:30 on whatever it is you "do." Athletics gets "double-blocked."

So does the band.

So do a bunch of other classes, like that new and interesting geometry class that involves construction time building a structure that from what I can tell is either an ice-fishing shack or one of those "swamp homes" from the bayou of Louisiana. 

Before I had children attending the local high school, I didn't care much about this system. Now, it flat-out drives me crazy.

-----

My high school years were spent doing all kinds of things. I wasn't a great athlete, but I participated in a number of sports. Today, we expect kids in Texas to choose one. You can play tennis or soccer. You can be in band or choir. If you want to do two things, well, then half of your coursework is determined by those…and the other half will be determined by the requirements to graduate from high school, i.e.--English, math, science, social studies. Oh, and you need a foreign language. And also, you need…

The list goes on. There are 2500 students in many of these schools. There are 12 spots on the varsity basketball team.

Contrast that with the state of my birth, where entire districts can have 300 students. In those cases, the marching band suffers on Friday night because the cornerback is also the #2 trombone player. He also takes part in theatre (theater), wrestling, and four other things throughout the year.

Crunch time for the Henley family came Monday. I have a son with serious musical ability. He wasn't all too excited about band at year's beginning; however, he realized how much better he had gotten this year. The grueling work he did last year paid off, and he finished as the #4 player in a district filled with tens of thousands of students. Watching the Pflugerville Pfestival of Bands (including an appearance from Texas State's marching band) helped, as well.

Horn players are like gold to a band director. They're needed in just about every small ensemble, and the instrument is fairly difficult to play. Everybody wants to play trumpet, saxophone, flute, drums. Then those kids turn around, looking for a horn player to complete their quintet or carry the tenor line for the ensemble. Pflugerville High School will be lucky to have him, and band will be a great experience for him. He'll travel. He'll be surrounded by friends and a "team" of 150 working toward a common goal. This will be great!

-----

OK, let's get this set up:

You have to take these four classes because they're "core." [Another blog is coming on THAT one…]

You have to take Spanish to graduate. Alright. That's five.

Want to play soccer--like you have for seven years, already? Your dad was your coach for three years. You're an Aztex fan. You're pretty good. You have a Messi jersey hanging on your wall. You ref little kid games for extra money. Soccer is your "thing."

That "double-blocked" course will set you up to seven classes.

You have eight, total.

OK, band, then...
Wait, that's double-blocked, as well!

You can't take band for one credit?

Doesn't matter. "Geometry+Ice-Fishing-Shack-Building 101" is also double-blocked, so you already have eight, anyway.

-----

I only majored in music because I was trying to cobble together enough money to go to college in the first place. I was worth $50 as a non-major…$400 or so as a music major. I fell in love with music when I discovered how music was being created in my theory class. I liked human interaction, so education was natural to me.

I needed to be 18 or 19 to discover these things, but they changed my life, and the lives of those of those I taught for a decade and a half. Music and music education defined my adult life and provided me with opportunities I couldn't imagine at age 13.

My son is 13. He won't have those musical opportunities.

He will miss many, many other opportunities because he is in Texas.

They do things BIG here.

And very, very specifically.

I'm sorry, Micah. I wish I could help you become everything you're capable of becoming.

But I can't. Not here...